Archive for the ‘friends’ Category

Today as I was walking through a store, I spotted a monkey which then reminded me of this.

I came across this Polish Proverb a few weeks ago.  This reminded me of a boss that I had when I was a 20 something.  He used to talk about the monkeys on his back.  The office staff even bought a stuffed monkey to put on his shelf behind his desk chair.

I wished I could have shared this Polish Proverb with him.  He would have enjoyed it.

As I was searching for the Polish Proverb, I also found this.


My boss would have loved this.  As I continued to reminisce about the boss that I had as a 20 something, I was reminded of all the great lessons that he passed on to me.  I hope that I can pass even one lesson on to the 20 somethings that I currently serve with.

Lessons from Pat included


extravagant generosity that he demonstrated and

that only very few people were aware of

how to handle difficult people on the phone

(It was a financial aid office at a university.)

how to handle constant changes in government regs regarding financial aid

laughter in the workplace in the craziness of financial aid

generous to his staff

love for God always

love for others regardless how they treated him – unbelievable love and mercy

Thank you, Mr. Pat Duncan!

The above picture is from his quartet days – long before I knew him.

This is a picture from the yearbook in 1980.  Yes, this pictures bring back a lot of memories.  In 1980 I was a student at this institution of higher learning.  I began working for Pat in 1984.

I wish that I could call you on the phone, Pat, and thank you for taking on me as a 20 something.

Below are the lyrics to a song that Pat sang and lived!

He’s Been Faithful to Me!

In my moments of fear

Through every pain, every tear

there’s a God who’s been been faithful to me!

When my strength was all gone,

when my heart had no song,

still in love He’s proved faithful to me.

Every word He’s promised is true.

What I thought impossible,

I’ve seen my God do.


He’s been faithful, faithful to me.

Looking back His love and mercy I see.

Oh, though in my heart I have questioned,

even failed to believe,

He’s been faithful, faithful to me.


When my heart looked away,

the many times I could not pray.

Still my God, He was faithful to me.

The days I spent so selfishly,

reaching out for what pleased me,

even then God was faithful to me.

Every time I come back to him,

He is waiting with open arms,

And I see once again.


He’s been faithful, faithful to me.

Looking back His love and mercy I see

Oh, though in my heart I have questioned

Even failed to believe

He’s been faithful, faithful to me.


In my heart I have questioned,

even failed to believe,

Yet he’s been faithful, faithful

In my heart, I have questioned, I’ve even failed to believe

Yet you’ve been faithful, faithful to me!

Thank you, Pat, for a life well lived and for sharing it with a 20 something who remembers those many lessons!

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What about lunch?

“It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like “What about lunch?” Winnie, the Pooh

or just dessert?

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What does honesty mean in our relationships?  I really have more questions about this than answers.  We say we want to have honest and authentic relationships, but our behavior says something different.

We say, “I want you to tell me the truth.”

Responses include

weeping and crying


getting defensive

How could you say that?

proving that I am right and you are wrong




end of the conversation

barriers and walls are created in that relationship

keeping asking friends for the truth until we get the answer we like

never speaking to that friend again

end of the relationship

In the end, we will remember not the worlds of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.  Martin Luther King, Jr.

An honest answer is the sign of true friendship.  Proverbs 24:26 CEV

Some people will not tolerate such emotional honesty in communication.  They would rather defend their dishonesty on the grounds that it might hurt others.  Therefore, having rationalized their phoniness into nobility, they settle for superficial relationships.         Author Unknown

So what’s a friend to do?

Therein lies the answer.

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Sustaining Health and Pastoral Excellence

Cluster of 7 female pastors

from the Church of God, Anderson (except for me)

who desire to love God and love others

who desire to be loving and grace-filled pastors

who encourage and inspire me

who share great words

who are learning about being as well as doing

who make me laugh

who are fun to be with

who have invited me into their lives so warmly and graciously

who love and care for me

who love God

Thank you friends!  I am loving our journey together.

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